Some easy and practical tips on how to stay loyal to your partner
When we talk about a relationship, the first thing that comes to our mind is love, trust, and loyalty. These values are essential in any relation – be it a love affair, a friendship, a parent-child relation, or a husband-wife bond. They not only build a relationship, but also act as a strong foundation or supporting pillars to sustain the ups and downs of it.
Blood relations are always taken for granted and are irreplaceable, but non blood relations i.e. friendship and marriage are not as steady and can be easily shattered, if not nurtured well. Today, we will be focusing on marriage and some tips to tackle a major issue that haunts every married couple – disloyalty.
1 Why is infidelity on the rise?
It is often seen that marriage witnesses beautiful moments in its initial years but with time, something goes amiss and we end up looking for options outside of marriage. With social networking sites opening up so many ways to easily connect with people from past and present, it is all the more important to not give in to this short lived adventure of attraction and infatuation – the devils that can ruin your relationship and make you repent life-long.
Before beginning with some handy and practical tips on how to stay honest to your partner, let us just for once realize that nobody is perfect. Nobody can give you everything you want. All you can do is overlook the shortcomings of your partner and try and talk it out, keeping in mind both of your perceptions.
Every person and every marriage has its lows, but it is upto you to either surrender, or learn from your mistakes and use it to make a better future. Just try these cute little tips from us that will help you stay honest and loyal to your partner.
2 Take a break often and go on a long vacation every year
All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. This is very true for us adults too. We need to take a break often from our monotonous routine and hectic life, in order to rejuvenate and refresh. Go out on weekends, watch a movie, or explore the town together. This can add to your romantic moments as well as keep you interested in each other.
A long vacation of about a fortnight or a month per year can make a huge amount of difference in your lives. Forget work, forget society and routine chores, just pack your bags and set out some place that offers peace, fun as well as good nightlife. Believe me, once you lose these days, you will repent for not making the most of out of it.
Mini or long vacations will bring you closer and not let you drift away. Reason being, you don’t need anyone else when the two of you are enjoying together and are friends with each other. Chitchat, go for a walk, cook together, and you will realize the world comprises of just the two of you.
3 Make some ground rules
An unplanned or haphazard routine/life will not do you any good. Plan things, make rules – rules that should be followed by both of you. For example, not bringing work from office, going for a half an hour walk daily, husband doing the weekend cooking, eating in the same plate, watching tv together late night, etc. All these cute rules will add spice to your dull life.
When you will do things together, you will start enjoying each other’s company and revel in it. This will not only keep the momentum going, but also set a good example for your kids. You will feel that life couldn’t get better than this.
You will have ample time for each other and that will take care of your strong bond and won’t let either of you sway away.
4 Spend some time in each other’s company alone
Most important than anything else is spending some time alone in each other’s company. Being enveloped by family, relatives, kids all the time, does not leave you with sufficient time for each other. This gradually creates some friction and unwanted space between the two of you, which ultimately results in extra marital affairs or unhealthy flirting with a third person.
All of us want at least one person with whom we can share our secrets or our day-to-day activities. If you are getting that person in the form of your spouse, nothing can beat it. After all, soul mate has not been given this name for no reason.
Share your experiences, fears, happiness, or even gossip around with your better half and listen to him/her as well. It is beautiful to have a friend for life.
5 Watch your wedding DVD/album to revive beautiful memories
This one is a tried and tested method to instantly revive your beautiful memories. Pictures and videos do take us back to those well spent times that we cherish forever. They also have a positive psychological effect on us.
Butterflies in stomach, glow on the face, blush on the cheeks, weak in the knees, are some symptoms of love. We all have experienced these, especially on our wedding day. We still get goose bumps thinking about that first kiss, that first walk, not to forget the first night. All those memories will run down your mind and enter your heart, rendering you the same romantic disposition you had when you were getting married.
Aww…I can feel you recalling those moments already…When you re-live that romantic time, you will have no reason to look elsewhere for love and romance. Try this today and bring back the same ‘newlywed romance’ in your life.
6 Swap tasks at home
You get to know each other better when you step in the other person’s shoes. Try swapping roles for a day. Husbands can take charge of kitchen while wives can go out and fetch grocery for home. Both of you will understand what efforts you put in that particular task, which will eventually lead to respecting each other all the more.
This is not just for understanding your spouse’s efforts, but this also can be a fun activity. To add to it, this will give you a day of change in your roles and bring some amount of adventure in your lives.
Adventure, fun, and change of role will keep you occupied and engaged to such an extent that you won’t even think of dating or looking out.
7 Forgive each other and don’t take things to heart
Forgiving each other is very important in order to build and maintain a strong relationship. We all have fights and arguments, but the trick lies in talking it out and forgiving your partner. Holding grudges has never been of help; it has only worsened the situation and turned the relationships sour. Let go of any harsh words or acts, sort it out, and do not linger on it.
Making up after a fight or argument always makes a relation stronger and sweeter than ever. Your love increases manifold for your partner because you had just been through a tough time together and cried your hearts out. Now that all is well, it’s only love that reigns supreme. With love ruling your life, any external beauty or beast can never enter your life.
8 Build and maintain trust, don’t demand or beg for it
Value of something increases manifold when you win it through efforts. Similarly, when you make efforts to build trust and win confidence of your partner, it lasts long and strong. Show your partner how much you care for him/her.
Surprise him/her, bring some flowers/chocolates or take her out for a surprise dinner someday. This will let your partner know that you have thought about him/her and made efforts to bring a smile on his/her face.
Asking your partner to trust you because you deserve it, is a big NO. Trust is built through years of commitment and loyalty. Do not give him/her a reason to doubt you or your intentions. Share your thoughts and expectations and let your partner understand what you are looking for. Do not just go out looking for someone else because you are not getting what you want from your partner.
What you want can be gotten from your partner itself, you just need to be open about it. Let me explain this with a simple example; if you want to eat spicy butter chicken but you don’t ask your wife for it, she will not make it, obviously. But, if you tell her someday that you are craving for butter chicken, I am sure she will be happy to cook it for you. As simple as that….
9 Set him/her free once a month to let him do whatever he likes/hobby
Now, this is very important that you set your partner free once a month to let him/her do what he/she loves. Your husband may like playing tennis but may not be going out to play, assuming you need his time and you won’t appreciate him leaving you at home.
Similarly dear husbands, your wife may be craving to meet up with her girl friends and go window shopping just like she used to before marriage, but is hesitant to convey this to you. Let each other know that your freedom hasn’t been taken away post marriage. You are free to follow your hobbies or engage in fun activities sometimes and forget your marital responsibilities for a day. We all need some precious time for ourselves.
When you are allowed to do whatever you want for a day by your partner, you cannot help but reciprocate and shower all your love on him/her after you have thoroughly enjoyed your time. You won’t feel the need to curb your desire anymore or hide it from him. You will rather enjoy and feel blessed to have a partner like him/her. Needless to say, this will add to your marital bliss.
There are many such things you could do to make your marriage stronger and more loving, like record each other’s voice chat and listen to it in his/her absence. Make love at the most unexpected time and see the magic come alive. Play cards or badminton with each other and lose on purpose to see that winning smile on your partner’s face. Simply lie down on the terrace and gaze at stars holding hands and feeling each other’s breath.
Believe me, those movies you see on the screen that turn you on, are also inspired from real life events. That kind of love does exist, but it depends on us if we make efforts to bring it in our lives or lose ourselves looking for fantasy lovers in the outside world.