Some important points Couples need to discuss before getting married
So you are getting married or are planning to bid adieu to singlehood soon? Great news! But did you know that some important points should always be discussed before marriage so as to ensure love and peace later? We bring you some such important points.
1 Hobbies, Interests and Me-Time
When two people think of coming together in a marriage, there might be two different sets of hobbies and interests they would bring along. It is also possible that both these sets might be poles apart from each other. It is always best to discuss how best to integrate both sets into the schedule of the couple after marriage. One weekend may find them going on treks and the other one might witness them dancing the night away under a moonlit night. Talking about interests, one may love to snuggle in bed with a book and read like there is no tomorrow.The other partner may want go out bowling at the same time. They must come to a conclusion regarding division of time to pursue their cherished activities so that none of them feels that injustice has been meted out to them.
2 Nature And Temperamant
The two people in question may possess different temperaments which they would bring into the marriage. One might be short-tempered and quick to fly into a rage while the other might love peace and quiet. Sometimes both could be short-tempered which could create a war zone at home. One might love talking and sharing knowledge while the other might like to keep to himself/herself. Talking about introverts and extroverts, a balance has to be achieved and the trigger points need to be discussed openly before marriage.
3 Parents, Children and pets
When a couple marries, they inherit a new set of parents each. With growing age, it could happen one day that one of them or both would be required to bring them home and care for them. This requires proper planning beforehand so that unpleasantness and anger can be avoided when the time comes. Having kids, how many and when is also another topic that needs to be discussed at length before marriage. One partner may have grown up with pets around him and the other might despise animals. These topics have to be disccused and brought to a conclusion before marriage.
4 Finance and Loans
It is wise to know beforeheand if either of the couple has a loan to repay. They must discuss about their savings in the bank, earnings and responsibilities and how they would wish to spend their hard-earned money. Some may have to send an amount home for parental care or for sibling education. Some may have taken a housing loan etc. How the loan would be repayed has to be understood between the two parties.
5 Physical intimacy
Couples need to discuss about their needs and desires, fantasies if any, before they marry, as they need to understand their compatibility in this area. Some may like it everyday while some only on the weekends. It is important to come to a conclusion regarding the frequency and variety they are likely to follow after marriage.
6 Priorities, Religion and Traditions
If it is to be an intercaste or inter-religious marriage, a lot of adjustments have to made lifelong. Tolerance has to be increased as well. Traditions might differ and these must be discussed at length before taking the plunge.
7 Faith, Trust And Jealousy
Couples need to talk about trust and other traits as well. If the wife has to work late into the night and gets dropped by a male colleague in the wee hours, how would the husband react? If the husband has to tour with his secretary for a fortnight, how would the wife react? Jealousy and over possessiveness can ruin things for the couple. Trust is of paramount importance in a marriage.
8 The Love Languages
There are different love languages and if you are lucky you might end up with a person sharing the same love language. But why take that chance? It is wise to find out how your partner wants to be loved by you. Whether by giving gifts, cooking for him/her, romantic gestures/getaways, sharing his/her favourite hobby etc. It is not necessary for a couple to feel loved by doing for each other, things that they love. You must know what the other person loves and how to go about doing that for them.
Now that you know what to ask your prospective life partners, what are you waiting for? Go right ahead and don’t forget to share a cup of coffee as you go about planning your life together. All the best!