How to deal with school bullies – 10 tips
Even the youngest kids can be terrible bullies and can make your son’s or daughter’s school days a real nightmare. Not always bullying comes in form of fights, but it can be in the form of insults, harassment, pushing, threats, stealing (even small things like pencils, lunch, notebooks, etc.). If you have noticed that your child isn’t quite thrilled about school, cries or acts very disturbed at home, maybe it is more serious than you think it is. These are some tips with which you can help your child overcome this?
1 Don’t blame your child
Nobody wants to be harassed, punched, insulted or humiliated in front of everyone. Sit down and talk seriously with them and it is really important that you believe them. Yes, children sometimes can lie in order to protect themselves, so make sure to get the truth out of him or her in a peaceful way.
2 Show them they are not alone
Tell your child that you are not going to let anyone hurt them. Encourage them with nice words and of course tell them that you will treat the bullying seriously even if that means talking to the Principal.
3 Advice your child
If the bulling isn’t harsh, advice your child to walk away from the bully. Bullies are often weak personalities who need to humiliate others in order to feel better for themselves. Explain to your child that if the bully doesn’t control their emotions (kids can cry easily or get mad) the bully can’t harm them anyhow (unless it’s a case of physical attack, then advice your child to defend themselves and run straight to their teacher). Usually, school bullies just want to make other kids feel worthless – often projecting their own frustrations, carried from what they have seen in their own homes.
4 Tell your child to stick to their good friends
If your kid has a couple of friends who are loyal to them and who love them, tell them to stick with them. Their friends’ support often can be much more effective than any adult’s conversations or advises.
5 Boost their confidence
If your kid feels angry, let them punch a pillow or a boxing sack (if there is any around). If you don’t think it’s the right way, good physical activity is always a great idea – such as hiking, cycling or running.
6 Ask them how they feel
It is important for the kid to understand their own emotions; whether they feel embarrassed, scared or just mad. Let them express their emotions and advice them not to dwell on the bad experience.
7 Talk about bullying
It doesn’t mean that every child will experience bullying at school but, it’s good to know that it might happen. So prepare them; explain that they are not guilty if another child would like to put them down and make them feel bad. Explain that the other person’s negativity is not about them, but in almost every case, their own personal way of existing.
8 Talk to the Principal/Parents of the bully
Don’t take this lightly. If you see that your child has problem focusing, hates to do the homework or refuses to go to school, go straight to the Principal’s office. Explain the situation to them and demand immediate solving of the problem. If this won’t help, make sure to inform the bully’s parents. Explain that you and your child aren’t helpless.
9 Help your child deal with the post bullying process
Don’t force them to heal as fast as possible. Give them time and if it is necessary, take them to a therapist. Speak to your child everyday and don’t let them think you have forgotten about it. Maybe in your eyes it would look insignificant and even funny, but don’t belittle the situation because for them, it is pretty serious.
10 Help your child
Kids can be picked for their physical appearance, for their background, race, clothes and literally anything. Your child needs to know that they are pretty and good enough just the way they are. If they have to be worried about all of the above at such young age, imagine the damage being done to their young minds and souls. Explain to them that difference doesn’t mean ugly or unacceptable. Explain that different race, family background or clothes aren’t the most important thing in the world and that talent, knowledge and kindness are far more important. Kids need to learn their value from a very young age.