12 Seemingly Harmless Phrases That Echo into Your Child’s Future Harming Them More Than You Think
6 “Well, you’re not that pretty”
A child looks at their parents as the first mirror to clearly understand what they are like. If parents are the ones to shatter their fragile self-esteem by downgrading their looks and appearance it will only make the child become too self-conscious in life. Criticizing every little thing like how their nails are not straight, or their nose is crooked, or that their hair is too thin, can make them loose confidence in themselves.
A parent should never tell their child such things like- “well, you’re not that pretty” as this will lead to them developing complexes about their imperfections. Neither should they make their kid believe that their beauty is unearthly. Instead, they should simply highlight and outline the good points about their child’s appearance. This will help the child become more confident about themselves.
7 “You are a boy/girl after all!”
Due to gender stereotypes, many parents stop or forbid their children from displaying certain behaviors and doing certain things. For instance, boys are told not to cry or show tenderness, or even wear pink colored clothes, while girls are told not to play with cars, or climb trees. Saying phrases like these can cause your child to develop a wrong idea about their gender roles. Boys might actually grow up to believe that girls are inferior since they were told that behaving like a girl is shameful. Girls tend to feel that all boys are aggressive hooligans and this causes a bunch of problems with the opposite sex for both parties.
8 “You can do better”
A child can have plenty of opportunities for improvement. But, it’s the parent’s job to help them improve and not overwhelm them with emotional distraught by commenting with phrases like “you can do better”. If parents give their children difficult task then it’s obvious that the kids will have to jump through a bunch to complete them. If you don’t reward your kids for trying or at least praise their efforts, it will only demoralize them. It will lead them to believe that whatever they do, always isn’t enough and that they could’ve done better.
9 “We’ve sacrificed our whole lives for you and you are ungrateful”
Never make your kid think that they always need to be grateful to you. Parents often work hard to ensure that their offspring lives a better life than they did. But this doesn’t mean that the child needs to always be paying off this debt to their parents. Any child who is instilled with this belief that they are the meaning of someone else’s existence shoulders a burden of responsibility. They carry around a sense of guilt of not being able to meet their parents’ expectations. To some, it may even feel like “living with a loan”.