12 Seemingly Harmless Phrases That Echo into Your Child’s Future Harming Them More Than You Think
Parents often don’t realize that their words can have a long-lasting impact on their children. While in most cases the parents show their concern by saying such words or phrases when they are annoyed at their child. But little do they know how their words can emotionally-traumatize their child. Some adult kids even struggle to overcome the pain they felt years after when they heard their parents speak those words.
However, the children who grow up and have a family of their own might end up repeating the same mistake their parents did. As a result, they say the same hurtful phrases to their children which then start a never-ending cycle.
Parents really need to be careful of what they say to the kids which is why they should never say these things to their kids.
1 “You won’t achieve anything in life”
Parents shouldn’t shatter their child’s self-esteem by saying things like- “You won’t achieve anything in life”. In doing so your child will start doubting themselves as they will feel that no one is going to believe in them, especially if their parents are the ones to think they aren’t capable of anything. By imposing such thoughts on your kid, they will begin to question if something is actually wrong with them.
When kids whose parents never believed in them grow up, they always give up on things in advance without even trying. Other such adults tend to dedicate their entire life to proving their parents wrong.
2 “You’re doing it all wrong. I’d better do it myself”
If your child isn’t able to fold the clothes properly or watch the food while it’s cooking, then don’t get too angry over it because no one is born with all these skills. Even after showing or teaching them how to do it, they will make mistakes often, but will gradually learn how to do it flawlessly. Rather than telling them that you can do it better yourself, parents should always show them how it’s done as many times as it takes. Making your children do small chores around the house helps develop their self-discipline and self-control. If you never allow them to do anything at all around the house, they will have a problem later in life whenever they have to try something new.
3 “There is nothing that is yours in this house”
Many parents make the mistake of ignoring their kid’s opinions, special needs, and feelings because they believe that children don’t have their own personality until they are financially stable. This toxic belief of a person being nobody until they earn money themselves only raises a generation of workaholics.
By telling your kid- “There is nothing that is yours in this house”, it only makes your kid feel depressed anxious and insecure. This will only make your child want to move out of the house and live off their effort. They feel more secure living in a small place because it will belong to them even though it’s not much. These kinds of kids when they grow up tend to work a lot because they feel that they have to keep working and producing results to feel significant.
4 “Do something useful”
There are many parents who always think that their kid should always be doing something useful. This involves cleaning their room, doing homework, or engaging in some extra-curricular activities. Parents shouldn’t always scold their child for daydreaming or slacking off a bit. Parents who do so, and force their kids to always be productive simply end up raising adults who cannot seem to ever relax.
5 “You can do better”
A child can have plenty of opportunities for improvement. But, it’s the parent’s job to help them improve and not overwhelm them with emotional distraught by commenting with phrases like “you can do better”. If parents give their children difficult task then it’s obvious that the kids will have to jump through a bunch to complete them. If you don’t reward your kids for trying or at least praise their efforts, it will only demoralize them. It will lead them to believe that whatever they do, always isn’t enough and that they could’ve done better.